Baking While Desperate

So it was that I found myself, at home, and feeling like all I really needed in this world was a good fudgy brownie. Well, a brownie and a glass of red wine. You see, it's been a stressful week: I opened a show (at some point I will explain the special hell that is tech week, but for now, just imagine a week-long root canal), I finished moving all the accumulated crap of six years out of my apartment with my husband and moving a large portion of it back into a house, it was my "special lady-time" of the month, and I'd just had an emotional ... I don't know, spat is the wrong word, but let's say a "lover's tense conversation" with the hubby, which turned out totally fine, but left me drained pretty much solely because I fear confrontation in all its forms. So I needed a brownie.

But it was late, and I did not have any brownie mix. Sadness. A reconnaissance mission to the cupboard, however, told me I did have cake mix. Hmmm....I thought. Could it be, that, much like toothpaste or shampoo, which they will market to you in a variety of formulas, claiming different qualities, but which you know damn well is probably the exact same ingredients under different labels (This one's "super whitening", this one "mends split ends"! No. No, it's all the same stuff), packaged baking mix is the same? But I digress. Brownies. How to get em.

What did I have to lose? I looked up what you put in brownie mix and applied that to my cake mix instead - 2 eggs, 1/2 cup oil and 1/4 cup water. I used walnut oil instead of vegetable oil, my sister having turned me on to it a while back (and she is QUEEN of cupcakes, so she knows what she's doing), mixed it all up, and popped it in the oven.

The result? A sort of cakey and light brownie, with a slightly gooey layer on top. A lot like brownies, but not exactly. So, what have we learned?

• 19 Crimes Cabernet Sauvignon is a great red wine that pairs well with desserts. (Honestly, that might be the best takeaway from this blog post.)

• Walnut oil is superior for baking.

• I fear confrontation.

• Cake mix is not exactly the same thing as brownie mix, but it will do in a pinch and...

• I am lying to myself when I say I am not an emotional eater.

Enjoy! I will see you again, dear readers, once I have seen GHOSTBUSTERS, and had a proper date with my husband! Because: priorities.